You are in an unhealthy relationship. That is, you think you are in an unhealthy relationship. However, you have decided to stay together hoping it will get better. There are certain myths about relationships that exist that will clarify your expectations. If you examine these myths, you may find that your relationship is not as bad as you think.
Myth #1! A great relationship depends upon like-minded souls. Remember, you are two different people. You are not Siamese twins. You are physically, emotionally, and mentally different.
Myth #2! A great romance necessitates romance. Do not expect the infatuation stage of initially falling in love. Likewise, for the tantric sex. A little romance always helps, but it is necessary to move on to the next step when the thrill is gone.
Myth #3! A great relationship necessitates the ability to solve problems. Don’t expect to resolve the differences between you. You are two separate people with two sets of beliefs of values. Most differences between partners are never resolved. Just agree to disagree and move on.
Myth #4! A great relationship necessitates common interests that tie you together. It is o.k. to have different interests. Just do not foist them on your partner. Respect his or her interests.
Myth #5! A great relationship is peaceful. Arguments are part of any relationship. It is healthy to argue so long as you do not attack the other’s worth in the process. Also, try not to raise your voice and yell. And do not get violent.
Myth #6! A great relationship lets you vent your emotions. If you let your feelings out all the time, you might say something that is hurtful and that you will regret. It will also most probably be used against you at a later time. Repression is part of life and so it is part of a relationship.
Myth #7! A great relationship does not necessarily involve sex. Do not underestimate the importance of sex in a relationship. It provides in the late Marvin Gaye’s words, “Sexual Healing.” If there is not enough for either partner, something is wrong.
Myth #8! A great relationship cannot survive a problematic mate. Remember, no one is perfect, and as long as you understand the flaws of your partner, you will be all right.
Myth #9! There is a right way and a wrong way to a great relationship. There are no rules, books, or standards to follow other than those you create yourselves. Do not compare yourselves with other couples. As my mother said, “No one knows what goes on behind closed doors.”
Myth #10! To have a great relationship you must change your partner. Never think you can change your partner. The key to a healthy relationship is to accept him/her as they are.
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