Paul Simon sings about “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover.” It is a whimsical song with a serious message. Breaking up is not an easy thing to do, but choosing the right way can make it easier on both of you: the dumper and the dumpee. Let us look at the worst ways of breaking up with someone. Sometimes, knowing what you should not do leads you to the path of righteousness.
Do not contact the person at work!! This is the worst way to break up with someone, especially if it is out of the blue. My ex IMed me at work that she was leaving me, and I nearly passed out. I was unable to function the rest of the day, and got seriously ill afterwards. Have respect for your partner, and do not e-mail, phone or contact him/her at work.
Please do not just disappear. This is also a horrible way to break up. Everyone deserves an explanation as to what went wrong, why, and also a good-bye. You have shared intimate moments with this person and spent precious time with him/her. He/she deserves an official good-bye. I had a long distance relationship with a guy, and just got my letters to him returned to me by the post office. I never knew what happened to him. After six years of waiting for him, I felt I deserved something more.
Ok, definitely do not just send an e-mail. E-mail can be cold and impersonal and you do not get a chance to see the person’s facial expression. You cannot respond, and you are alone with your thoughts of vengeance and anger. It is rude and inconsiderate.
Don’t go on a date to break up. Breaking up in a restaurant can be very humiliating. Not only does the whole restaurant hear your personal business, but you are stuck at the table with your dumper who has you as a captive audience telling you what a horrible mate you are. I had someone do this to me, and I was nauseous.
NO WAY! Do not stand them up. This is also rude and mean. Setting a date and intentionally standing that person up to indicate to them that you do not want to see them anymore is not nice.
Oh god -Do not avoid them. This is a case of cowardice. Confront your lover when you want to end it. Like Tom Petty sings, “Waiting is the Hardest Part,” and your lover is probably waiting to hear from you as well as worrying about you.
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